Some days, I feel like a complete fraud. I preach about the dangers of genetically modified foods both with my tongue and my fingers. But I don’t completely avoid them. And I knowingly don’t do so.
Sure, they scare me, but I don’t go to all costs to avoid them. I give in, too often. They are everywhere. Literally, everywhere. I am physically surrounded by them on my two-acre slice of paradise. At the brim of our property is a sprawling field of Round Up Ready soy. They are also everywhere in society: grocery stores, pharmacies, restaurants and even the farm stands and farmers’ markets. The picky eater in me is far too content to stick to her old ways.
The truth is, every time I eat a morsel that I know contains GMO Ingredients, I feel guilty. I feel guilty for letting down the few people who follow me here on Picky to Plenty, for letting down the friends and family I have warned about the dangers of GMOS, but mostly, I feel guilty to myself for continuing to contaminate myself with toxins we don’t know enough about. Food can either be the best form of health care or the slowest form of poison.
I have felt a shift building up inside me for more than a year now, but I feel like I have barely made any change. Sure, the majority of the foods I purchase are labelled organic, but that doesn’t always mean they are better for me. For a while I was focussed on eating healthy and I felt better. But lately, I’ve fallen into a slump and I can’t seem to emerge from it. I am inspired to make change but my feet are glued to the floor. I am far too comfortable in my old ways. I know what I want to do, where I want to be, but I am having a hard time getting myself to move in that direction. The fire that was building up seems to have fizzled, resembling more of a trail of smoke than a blazing path. I find myself dreaming far more often than doing. Instead of working toward the dream, I waste time filling a board on Pinterest with that dream will look like.
The truth is, change is hard. Incredibly hard, especially when you are a somewhat stubborn person like me. And even more so when the change you are trying to make is to eat healthier and you have been an extremely picky eater for your entire life. It is easy to stick to what I know. But I know too much to stick to the ways that I know. I can’t unlearn the truths I have uncovered about our modern day food system. I can’t unlearn the acronym GMO and the scary reality that it stands for. I can’t unlearn what I know about how factory farmed animals are treated — and the fact that they nosh on GMO feed — nor can I unlearn the changing of their biology to feed our greed. I have to change. I need to change. I want to change.
The last part of that sentence is key, want. You need to want something first in order to make it happen. I need to let go of my familiar ways because I want to be better. I want to live better and to do so, I need to eat better. So goodbye to the convenience foods I have come to rely on. The ones that have tickled my tastebuds but given little back to me in the form of nutrition. I need to cut these foodstuffs out of my life for good and learn begin nourish myself. That’s no easy task for a picky eater in recovery like myself. One who’s childhood vegetable appreciation extended to celery and nothing more.
As I stated in my last post, I failed miserably at gardening this summer. Unlike last summer, I haven’t been able to do most of my fresh produce shopping in my own backyard. I ended up with only a handful of beans before my free-range flock decided to dig them up for me (my half-assed, makeshift chicken proofing clearly was no match for them), my peppers are stunted and the fruits not as tasty, my tomatoes were ridden with blight and the ones that are not effected are small and not nearly as plentiful. Even my ground cherries, which grew by the hundreds last year, were not a plentiful crop. The kale was plentiful before the cabbage moths claimed it for themselves. My lettuce was growing well but I fell behind on succession planting and am in a period of waiting for the olds ones to go to seed and the new ones to grow large enough to begin harvesting. There were ups and downs, but mostly I can write my summer 2015 gardens off as a failed project.
Summer’s end doesn’t mean the gardening window closes. It simply means an opportunity to grow different crops. An opportunity to eat different foods. Some of the crops I am growing this fall I have never eaten before. Like turnip. The picky eater in me says resist this strange root food at all costs, but the plentiful side says turnip fries can’t be that bad, can they? I guess I will find out in another 30 or so days when the first of my turnips are ready for harvest. I am also looking forward to trying this drool-worthy gratin once these roots are ripe for picking.
The original purpose of this blog was to share with others my journey of transforming my picky palette to embrace different foods. Sure, I have shared a few recipes along the way, but my dream of farming kind of took over. I need to marry the two components of my blog together and share more about the cooking side. After all, it is my love of cooking (and my addiction to food porn) that inspired this whole thing in the first place. But that doesn’t mean I won’t be posting about growing and raising your own food, that is still a key ingredient in the recipe that makes Picky to Plenty what it is. Only I plan to marry everything together. If I am posting about growing turnips, I should certainly share with you a way to use them in the kitchen. Sure, not every post warrants a recipe (not sure how I could fit one into the one on spring cleaning the coop or pasty butt), but if I can tie one in, be sure that I will.
Expect to see some amazing food porn coming out of this little space on the Internet. Starting with my favourite sandwich which I will sharing with you later this week.